Emotions escape almost nobody, and yet it’s so hard to be in touch with them, and to make sense of them, much of the time. Sometimes we react to our emotions in unhealthy ways. Not wanting to deal with them, not wanting to face them, and not understanding what is provoking them.

We want people to understand us, to empathize with us, and yet we don’t always know what it is that we need or why we need it. The challenge I am trying to overcome is how to look inward before reacting to how I am feeling. I need to stop, taking the time to process what I am feeling inside, before saying or doing things that aren’t reflective of the power I hold within. Often my feelings are triggered and then hidden behind anger, fear, lashing out, and or smiling while inside I am breaking.

Sometimes, if I pause, I can understand the triggers — whether from past events that remanifest, fear of rejection or hurt, or uncertainty. Anxiety, sadness, anguish, and often times, positive feelings of happiness, pride and love are all things we manage in our minds. Our conviction as people comes from the ability to be genuine, to harness these feelings, and to use them to guide our thoughts and ways of being.

I try to remind myself that we are human — that means we can make mistakes. Often, I am hard on myself, and beat myself up beyond whatever difficult emotion I am grappling with, because of my response and or behavior. We need to learn to stop, think, process and then work through our emotions. We can call people we love, write down what we are feeling, take a minute to think about our feelings, why we are having them, the validity of them, and different ways we can respond to them.

Situations are always going to arise. How we respond to them is up to us, and it can either be measured, or it can be impulsive, explosive or abrupt. I am challenging myself to examine my behavior that stems from my emotions and moods — whether I am anxious, tired, afraid, or happy. We cannot control many of the things we face day to day, but perhaps, we can control our responses and use our emotions to lead us in a direction of personal growth and healing. Life isn’t always easy, but we need to look introspectively into our souls and nourish them with the understanding that we can choose how to move forward regardless of what we are feeling.